Saturday, May 7, 2011

Transitions and a Poem for Mother's Day

Tomorrow is Mother's Day. This Mother's Day, I'm in the midst of a huge life transition, much of which has to do with being a mother, and for the first time in my life, I'm actually enjoying this transition. This has not always been the case - I've always struggled with them, thinking I had to speed up in order to get to the next place, only to discover that this just caused way too much anxiety for me and anyone unfortunate enough to be along for the ride.

But a change is happening - yes, THAT change with all that goes with it. And THAT change is finally teaching me to just give in to the larger powers that be and when I feel a transition happening, to just let it happen.

I don't want to reveal too much about the transition because I like the suspense, but as of June 1st, Mamazblogging will morph into a new world. For the past four or five years, I've been writing on this blog mostly about being a mother. Specifically, about being an older mother.  It's been a great journey, but my world has expanded back out again and I'm wanting to not only write about motherhood from my quirky point of view, but also about the other things that get me out of bed and also keep me up at night.

As I enter into Mother's Day, a day usually fraught with guilt, tepid brunch food served by grumpy waiters (I can say this because I was one of those grumpy waiters in my youth) and another pair of pajamas. It's also a day to bask in the glory of this path and responsibility and blessing.

Call your mother, your stepmother, your grandmother, your best friend's mother. Call your sister, your sister-in-law, your aunt, your godmother, your stepmother. Call your adoptive mom, call your mentor mom. Call your neighbor. Call a new mother. Call a mother whose child is a soldier. Wish them a Happy Mother's Day and ask them to tell you what it is like to be a mother.

I will wake up in the morning and be showered by my beloved children's tender gifts and cards. But before I do, I wanted to try to get into words who and what I am as a mother. It's for my kids, my friends, my husband, my family. It's for me. It's sort of my farewell to Mamazblogging and a hello to the next stage in my life.

I Am A Mother: Motherhood Squared

I am a mother. I am a mother who has three daughters. I am a mother of twins. I am a married mother. I am a white mother. I am a Jewish mother. I am a mother who is straight. I am a mother with GLBT friends. I am a mother who is 52 year old.  I am a mother who has young children. I am a mother who works. I am a mother who plants sunflowers. I am a mother with crabgrass and dandelions. I am a mother who yells too much. I am a mother who cries easily. I am a mother who misses her father. I am a mother whose father lived to three days short of 98 years old. I am a mother who loves her mother. I am a mother whose mother is almost 80 years old. I am a mother who father escaped the Nazis. I am a mother whose father’s mother and youngest brother were killed by the Nazis. I am mother whose mother’s mother fled the Pogroms. I am a mother who touches. I am a mother with three cats, one dog, a tortoise and a dozen fish. I am a mother who loves to cook. I am a mother who hates to cook. I am a mother who hates to clean the house. I am a mother who does the laundry. I am a mother who takes her children into her bed. I am a mother who writes. I am a mother who sings. I am a mother who dances. I am a mother who loves baseball. I am a mother who volunteers. I am a mother who loves kissing her husband. I am a mother who loves making love. I am a mother who does Yoga. I am a mother who owns her own business. I am a mother who is an aunt to eleven nieces and nephews. I am a mother who loves the ocean. I am a mother who loves the mountains. I am a mother who drinks coffee in the morning while the rest of the house is asleep. I am a mother who drinks tea in the evening when the children are in bed. I am a mother who is hopeful. I am a mother who fights for her kids. I am a mother who loves her children’s friends. I am a mother who has a soft belly. I am a mother with curly auburn hair covering my gray. I am a mother who wears red glasses. I am a mother who has hot flashes. I am a mother who has night sweats. I am a mother who desires kindness. I am a mother who does not believe in not believing. I am a mother who reads the newspaper. I am a mother who reads books. I am a mother who reads to her children. I am a mother who loves the smell of a used bookstore. I am a mother who wears her father’s watch. I am a mother with a too short temper. I am a mother who is impatient. I am a mother who does crossword puzzles. I am a mother who loves to walk. I am mother who hates to fly. I am a mother who makes bread. I am a mother who does not know how to knit. I am a mother whose house is too small. I am a mother who lived in New York City. I am a mother who was born in California. I am a mother whose parents were immigrants. I am a mother whose windows need to be cleaned. I am a mother with bright green curtains. I am a mother who is married to a kind poet.  I am a mother who breastfed three children. I am a mother who has blue eyes, like both my parents. I am a mother who lives in Colorado. I am a mother who lights Shabbat candles. I am a mother with arthritis in her toe. I am a mother who loves dark chocolate. I am a mother who wants to be a grandmother. I am a mother.

5 comments:

Andrea Trank said...

Thanks for sharing. It sounds a lot like my life minus the description of your curly hair, blue eyes, etc. Oh right, I have boys who don't give me tender gifts, they fart on me affectionately. I do have a fabulous husband who shares your history and your wonderful way with words. Happy Mother's Day. Love you, Andrea

Barbra Wilder said...

How exciting to be in this transition. I await the unfolding.
Blessings my dear friend.

Lisa Trank said...

Andrea - my girls fart on me too! Love you and hope you had a beautiful Mother's Day!

Lisa Trank said...

Barbara, your book, Power Woman, is by my bedside - NOW I'm ready to put it into action!

JDG said...

and what a gorgeous writer you are, among other things that are gorgeous and are you
DH