Tuesday, January 8, 2008

My Pretend Job Just Got Eliminated


Today I did the following for my newest and what I hope is my last career venture. I am stepping into: "My Real Life after Being Laid Off from My Pretend Job"

I was laid off yesterday from a job that didn't really exist, but existed enough to be laid off from. It's a bit of a tale how I came to have a pretend job, and hopefully you will be reading about it one of the fabulous magazines I trust will pick it up. But as part of my unemployment insurance agreement (see #9), I'm supposed to keep track of my daily activities that will hopefully lead to future and sustained employment. So here goes:

Day 1
1. Woke up @ 6:15am - gotta keep those job habits going.
2. Drank two cups of coffee.
3. Wet the girls hair before school.
4. Made lunch for oldest DH.
5. Changed out of my pjs - essential to wear real clothes when working from home. That was one of the most depressing things about freelancing from a home office - the wardrobe which mostly consisted of paint-spotted sweats, non-descript long sleeve or short sleeve t-shirts, fleece jacket and slippers. I swear most of take jobs we don't want because we just like to have the money for some new clothes and people to see us in them.
6. Dropped off kids at school. Stayed to chat with other parents for the first time in two months.
7. Drove home.
8. Made myself breakfast.
9. Applied online for Unemployment Insurance.
10. Wrote my first piece about my pretend job and getting laid off.
11. Took a shower.
12. Picked up the twins from school.
13. Spent $177 at Vitamin Cottage. Healthy snacks that should last us for the next century. Or until Friday.
14. Deposit vacation pay into the bank and resisted buying a ticket to Mexico.
15. Wrote some more.
16. Did two music lessons, one with lots of fuss, but we got it done.
17. Did two loads of laundry.
18. Picked up oldest DH, playdate friend with twins, DH and dog Milo.
19. Did music lesson with oldest DH.
20. Wrote a query for pretend job piece and submitted it to the Life section of Salon.com.
21. Didn't miss my pretend job one single bit.

And it's only 6pm! I plan on keeping this list going until I am gainfully employed with a real job in a real company, or get paid incredibly well for my writing, whichever comes first.

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